Bacon with Fork

Sorry for not updating more last week. I got busy with some other ideas of mine that turned out to suck on 11 different levels. But you can start counting on at least two new posts every week this fall. The first college football picks post will be up by Wednesday, I just finalized the guest prognosticator for week 1. If you are interested in picking against me, shoot me an email and I will fit you in for a college or NFL week. Every week I lose (I get the benefit of a tie) the V Foundation will get another $10 from me. I hope the challenger would throw a Hamilton at cancer research if I beat them, but it won’t be mandatory.

So last weekend one of my brothers, Forky, flew into to Chicago to take in a couple of White Sox games at the Cell. Selfishly, I love when I get to host Dcats up in Lake Forest or Chicago, I try to pack as much fun possible into the small window. Forky and I had a mini sports camp on Saturday late morning/afternoon, playing tennis, taking batting practice while watching a blue/gold sophomore Scouts scrimmage. We watched a handful of Steven Raichlen, Barbeque U http://www.bbqu.net/, shows on one of the public television stations. We talked to Big Steve about getting a smoker and Ozzie Guillen. Drank cold beer. Solved all the world’s problems from health care reform to improving the Food Network with more tailgate related programming. We also interspersed a couple of handfuls of more fun things, but what will be remembered about the weekend is the unbelievable adoration that the SouthSiders have for Gordon Beckham, their rookie manning the hot corner and hitting 2nd.

They took him number 8 in last years draft out of Georgia to play shortstop, but he shot through the system and came up this May. He started out pretty slow, but he owned the month of July hitting .380 or some bullshit like that. He is a good looking white dude that keeps his head down and plays the game the right way, so immediately all the sportwriters and sports talk idiots (who are all white sox fans to begin with) have huge man crushes on him that border on creepy. And then they started asking Ozzie about him in press conferences. His broken English makes “Beckham” sound like “Bacon”, so now this dude has the coolest one word nickname ever. And to top off the lovefest he has a phenomenal entrance song, Your Love by The Outfield (Josie’s on a Vacation far away). And the White Sox play the song about 3 times during his at bats and everybody in the stadium sings along. There was a girl that was White Sox attractive (aka South side hot or Homewood-Flossmoor pretty) holding up a sign that read “Hey Beckham, Your Dad Must have been a Baker because You’ve got a Great Set of Buns.” And everyone in the stadium loved it.

I’m sure that the level of love for Jesus Tebow in Gainesville is on par, but the only other time I have really experienced anything on that level was in Green Bay two years ago with Favre. And that was after a million years and a Super Bowl. This Beckham lovefest is going to go in a ton of different directions, all of them weird.


Finally, I am now boycotting the Cubs. We are a miserable disaster and I hate everyone on the team. I will still watch the games/listen to the on the radio and wear my gear that I currently wear. But I will not spend one more dollar at the ballpark, on any gear, or at any of the bars on clark street (not including Houndstooth Saloon b/c I want to watch Crimson Tide games there this year) until the direction of the team takes a turn for the better. I figure that this is going to take between 3-5 years because of the financial obligations we still owe to old, crappy, lazy players.